I know that I haven’t posted in a while and I have been questions as to why I haven’t. I want to address these questions and also discuss the reason that zebras sometimes take a leave of absence from life. I guess you can say this is a two part blog post.
So to answer some of the questions. I have not been posting because school is always my main focus. I am in my last year of school and currently interning. It’s a wonderful year but it is kicking my butt to say the least. I am always working on something and sometimes (okay, most of the time) overwhelmed. I haven’t posted in a while because I want to try and put forth effort into every post I put out and I haven’t felt like I had the time (or brainpower) to produce anything half decent. So, I refrained from posting but through people messaging me I realized that you guys are probably more interested in a half baked post than no post at all. For that I am sorry. I will try and do better. And I want to say thank you for everyone who has been asking me if I am okay. I am doing just fine other than the constant stress from school! Thank you for caring about me enough to message and ask questions. I really appreciate it.
I also want to talk about the reason that many EDSers or zebras or anyone with a chronic illness sometimes checks out for a bit. Living with an chronic illness is like never being alone. There is something always there and a voice that is always saying, “you’re doing too much” or “you can’t do that it’s going to hurt”, but there is also thoughts about how your friends or family feel about you. About having to change plans to meet your needs or having to help you in any way. These wear you thin after a while and sometimes the best medicine is a hiatus. Taking a week to rest your body, mind and soul can be the best thing for someone like me. I love spending time with my friends and family but sometimes I need that me time to survive. Now this part is so important. This does not mean I am mad at you, tired of you, annoyed with you, we are still friends, and chances are I miss the mess out of you but my chronic illness is causing me to need a “vacation”. I am going to use that word because it sounds less terrible than a mental break, hiatus, etc. There have been times where I don’t want a “vacation” but need one and I miss out on certain situations and I have learned to deal with that the best I can but getting everyone else to understand why I go MIA randomly is one of the hardest things to do. I understand where you are coming from though. Going from seeing someone everyday to not seeing them for a week is strange and I would feel like that person hated me too but I promise it is just the opposite. So next time a friend is taking a “vacation” try and give support but give them distance, understand that they love you and as soon as their recovered, you can go get coffee and talk about your week. Got to enjoy the EveryDay Successes! 😉